I know, I know...

So I don't want to cause anyone a heart attack, but I'm actually posting on my blog! Nevermind that I should have been in bed twenty minutes ago. What else is a blog for, if not to be a productive excuse for using time on things besides sleep?You can thank Ruthie for this post though. She made me want to again. And it also helped that I actually finally remembered how to post! Not that you have any reason to believe me, but I actually did try to post a couple times before, but could not for the life of me figure out how, and so I would distract myself with other people's blogs until I ran out of time or attention. Tonight I discovered that you must first sign in. So if there are any other poor lost bloggers out there, who would post if they knew how, there ya go ;) At the expense of my pride, I just answered the question you were too afraid to ask.I think part of the reason it is hard for me to blog is the same reason I get nervous whenever I organize gatherings. A certain flavor of fear settles in my stomach, saying that no one will show up to the event, or even worse, a few will show up and expect a slamming party when really only 2 other people came becasue the hostess just isn't cool enough. As I write, I wonder if I am just writing to myself, or if someone else will really spend the time and energy reading about a young adults struggle with self-confidence. :DI'm not trying to put myself down, just exploring the blogging part of my psyche.Whew. I don't know about you, but that was therapeutic for me. Maybe next time I'll even write about more people than just myself. But for now, I'll go to bed so I can wake up excited for school and work tomorrow...